Wednesday, April 15, 2009


As I traversed the Ambridge Gyratory System* the other morning I was struck by the contents of the large estate car in front. Two gormless lop eared Labradors gazed benignly out at me, until the car hung a left and disappeared down the ramp to the Councillor Dan Archer Park and Play Area.

Walkies, it seems, have become "bit of a drivies". Man's best friend no longer has to turn out attached to a leash and walk to the park before getting to zoom about like a lunatic chasing a tennis ball. Now Fido can expect to be chauffeur driven there and back again, and spend ten or fifteen minutes wheezing about after some fuzzy, squeeky monstrosity from the pet shop that looks like a failed genomics experiment and has none of the roll or bounce potential of the good old b-a-l-l (sorry felt the need to spell it out just in case any dogs were listening).

I worry slightly that as soon as they develop a playstation controler adapted to the canine paw, instead of a drive to the park, poor pooch will be parked in front of the doggy version of Doom or Quake, and left to get on with it. It's no wonder our pets, like their owners and their owners kids, are facing an obesity crisis.

There's just one word for it really.


* The ring road hemi circumnavigating our fair town, not the 1970's Jazz Fusion Combo of the same name.


Z said...

Everyone I know whp goes there drives to the nearest gym. It's slightly more than a mile and a half from my house, less from any of theirs. Pah, really. At least I cycle (further, and uphill) to the swimming pool.

The dear dog mostly walks herself. She'd love Lakey Hill, but has to make do with the Ups-and-Downs.

Swiss Missus said...

My God, my eyes were about to pop out of their sockets (I'd need a doc then, right?)... until I got to the "gormless lop eared Labradors".

Now... you were saying?

Doctor Jest said...

Z-- How true. It's almost like we've forgotten what legs are for. Only thing is, do you not feel you're taking your life in your hands every time you mount up, or do you have cycle paths in your neck of the woods?

Swiss Mrs-- come come, dear lady, you should know this blog is strictly vanilla by now. Can't resist an attention grabbing header now and then tho'

Swiss Missus said...

I think it was your masterfully suggestive employment and placement of the question mark. I'm still awestruck.


Z said...

Quite a few people only do measurable exercise - probably in the same way that some mothers feel reassured by bottle-feeding their babies because they know how much they've had. It's not surprising, we all are used to targets, box-ticking and evaluating data these days.

Not many cycle paths, but a lot of cyclists, so motorists are courteous and aware on the whole. I'm fine around the town, but the winding, narrow country roads are more nerve-wracking.