Tuesday, February 26, 2008

I give up!

Eddie came to the chest clinic this morning. His asthma is pretty well controlled with his present inhalers, and his lung function is appropriate for his age, and this despite his four decade smoking history. He says he would like to quit, but has tried all the methods available, with no lasting success. Still, this year he has decided to get serious and so, for Lent, he has given up.

Smoking.

Indoors.

Sadly, this behaviour modification has coincided with a bit of an upturn in the weather. In the past couple of weeks, Ambridge has been graced mainly by clear skies and brilliant sunshine or scattered, scudding clouds and a stiffish breeze. So in reality he’s not so much given up as changed venue.

Admittedly that makes it less likely that he will light up first thing, what with the rather frosty mornings such clear skies also cause; or last thing, since it’s still a bit nippy for standing on the patio in PJ’s, dressing gown and slippers. So this in part explains his drop from ten a day to six or seven. The problem is Lent will be up in another three weeks.

I’m also a bit baffled by the logic. Is it somehow more sinful to smoke indoors, polluting your own space, than outside, polluting everybody else’s? Or is God just watching what we get up to inside, knowing he can safely leave outdoors to Her Britannic Majesty’s Government, with their plethora of CCTV cameras and US loaned spy satellites? Or is this a new variation on the “calories don’t count if you’re standing up” argument?

I’m left wondering what other sins it might be safer to indulge outdoors, but, to be honest, so far I’m coming up blank.

13 comments:

steveg said...

Not exactly sure doc, but I've always thought that road rage is sin best indulged in outdoors! :-)

I like Eddie's smokers logic though - I've been there on that one, bravely believing that you are acheiving something by cutting down 3 or 4 or even 10 fags a day for a while, but it always goes back...

I have been nicotine free for just over a year now, I have tried one or two during that time, and frankly, they tasted so awful that I couldn't finish them, and now have a sincere desire to keep as far away as possible from anyone using them too! This time, it seems, it really is for good! :-)

Steve

Anonymous said...

Herding cats? Sorry, not a sin, more a hobby.

Jan

BenefitScroungingScum said...

I have to say it's logic that makes perfect sense to me too, maybe it's a smoking mindset?! My friends and I are very fond of the calories don't count if you can't remember them logic!
My nicotine free was a year yesterday, I've not tried even the 'odd one' as I know I'd end up back on them.
Bendy Girl

Mannika said...

Hi Dr Jest,
NHS Online is an independent website dedicated to the healthcare community. As part of our re-launch we would love to feature your blog entries on the website.

The link to the existing website is http://www.nhsonline.net/

Please contact me at mmehli@cyworks.co.uk for details.

Thanks,

Mannika

orchidea said...

Exhibitionism, possibly. Certainly not safer outdoors, but there's no point in doing it indoors is there?

Ditto voyeurism.

Don't they say the frisson of fear is what makes it so attractive? Not that I'd know, of course. I don't know owt about stuff like that... ~trails off~

Doctor Jest said...

steveg-- congrats on your smoke free year and a bit. Interesting just how the tastebuds revive once you quit isn't it? And I'd agree, indoor road rage would be a serious mistake!

Anonymous Jan-- can feel the worshipers of Bast turning against you as we speak. Only thing is, from my experience, indoor cat herding is a tad easier if you have enough family and friends to work every interior door in the right sequence to round th elittle darlings up in the room especially prepared to have no hiding places at all.... ;-)

bendy girl-- I see I'm just noot groking the whole smokers logic thing. Congrats to you on a smoke free year. Is this comments page beginning to sound a bit "twelve step programme" at all?

Mannika-- I'll be in touch. What if any affiliation to the NHS has your website if you don't mind me asking?

orchidea-- I suspect it's warmer indoors, but I'm sure I don't really know what you mean... (bother, can't find a "tilde" key) this trailling off thing seems to be catching (nope, still can't. Ho hum.)

orchidea said...

This probably won't help much because I have a QUERTZ rather than a QUERTY keyboard, but on mine it's at top right grouped together with les accents graves et circonflex, ctrl+alt.

orchidea said...

QWERTZ not QWERTY

:O

As good an argument for touch-typing as any other...

Doctor Jest said...

orchidea-- indeed, but querty looks more grammatically correct n'est ce pas?

Incidentally though I'm pretty sure I can't get it on the lap top at home I have no such problem on the desk top at work ~see.... trailing off again for some reason...~

Mannika said...

Hi Jest,

We are independent from the NHS.

Our website will be for NHS healthcare professionals to talk about, discuss and debate all the issues that affect their working lives, so it would be great to have you on board.

If you have any further questions please fee free to email me at mmehli@cyworks.co.uk.

Thanks,

Mannika

Doctor Jest said...

Mannika-- I don't seem to be able to get your email to work, so apologies for the apparent "radio-silence". I have no problem with you linking to this site if you wish, but would caution that I only post here for my own amusement / sanity. As you can see the posting tends to be erratic and varies greatly in frequency, quality and subject matter, and I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be able to write to any sort of commission or deadline. If you can live with that then by all means go ahead.

Regards,

Dr J

Anonymous said...

Hi Dr J,

Thanks for getting back to me. I understand that you write your blog as and when you feel like it and I know therefore you won't have any particular deadlines on how often you update it.

But we would still love to feature the blog as it is on our website. We won't have a direct link to your blog but we will have your blog up as if you directly wrote it on our website and nothing will be changed from your original blog.
Please let me know if you have any further questions.

Mannika

Doctor Jest said...

Mannika-- "We won't have a direct link to your blog but we will have your blog up as if you directly wrote it on our website and nothing will be changed from your original blog."

I'm not sure how I feel about that. Being the loosest of loose cannons I would not wish to be seen to be associating with any specific editorial stand point or endorsing any specific agenda. I think I may have to pass.

Sorry.

Dr J